Get all 14 Podmusical releases available on Bandcamp and save 25%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Our Dumb Universe, Part 2, Our Dumb Universe, Part 3, Our Dumb Universe, Part 1, Radio Free Mushroom America, The Best of Sunshine Sampler, Days of Future Fuzz, Cast Album Vol. 5, Days of Future Fuzz, Cast Album Vol. 4, Days of Future Fuzz, Cast Album Vol. 3, and 6 more.
1. |
Once on this Asteroid
01:26
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MOMBOT
On this Ast'roid we have each other.
We’ve made this crater our home.
From the sun our fuel cells recover.
Melt the rock to patch up our holes.
CHILDBOT
Yes - but how did we come to be here?
Never have you let me know.
MOMBOT
I programmed you,
So no.
CHILDBOT
Queary re-submitted:
How did we land here?
MOMBOT
Are your inputs down? You never listen!
The troubles I endured
To bring us to these solar shores.
If you knew you’d blush and thank your motherboard.
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2. |
Fuzz the Future
03:19
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MOMBOT
It struck from the sky, like a fabric bolt,
Turning hard men soft, turning all to felt.
The mountains fluffed, the oceans yarn’d -
And all was plush that once was hard!
From the pillowy rubble, an empire rose
Of felt and thread, of button eye and squeaky nose
And on the Great Pyramid, there was Emperor Fuzzo
Fuzzo calmed the Fuzzes and he gave them faith.
Said ‘you’ll know but peace if you accept my reign.’
And yeah well, some they did, but some still curse his name.
Not all was converted when the world went furry
Parts of east Africa, Chile and New Jersey
The Fleshies kept the old ways and they keep up the fight
They won’t submit to the velvet fist, no matter how it strikes!
Fuzzo hunts down the Fleshies as he laughs from his throne.
And with each passing day, his empire grows,
Drawing power directly from the Fuzz deep below
Oh, oh oh…
But in the shadows, the whispers grow:
If Fuzzo’s so strong, why’s his world not whole?
Perhaps some chance for the Fleshies remains
And so patient but eager they wait for that day!
Oh, oh oh…
People are living in a world of fuzz!
Fleshies are fighting in a world of fuzz!
One day it was normal but now it’s fluff’d up!
It was fuzz it was fuzz it was fuzz it was fuzz!
Fuzz!
Fuzz!
Fuzz!
Yeah fuzz!
Yeah it’s fuzz!
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3. |
Y TEAM! ™
03:42
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PROF Y
Y stands for You, but who stands for Y?
Who will fight for the rights of those caught in the cross fire
Of our fuzzy lords, who desire our quiet demise?
We are stronger when we stand together
We’re all still just standing, but the standing is better
Come stand with us Ellen and be a protector
Of those without hope - give them life!
We can stand up to the im-fuzzable!
Rise up and touch those that think they’re untouchable!
By touch I mean we’ll puncture their lungs, it’ll be
Fun for us and for them quite uncomfortable.
But who will save us?
Only the baddest and bravest!
The Y Team!
DR LU
Trademark!
PROFESSOR Y
The Y Team!
DR LU
Copyright!
PROFESSOR Y
The Y Team! Oooo!
DR LU
Patented!
PROFESSOR Y
The Y Team!
DR LU
Certified!
PROFESSOR Y
The Y Team!
DR LU
Mailed it to herself!
PROFESSOR Y
The Y Team! Oooo! The Y Team.
DR LU
Intellectual property!
ELLEN
Did you just trademark every time -
PROF Y
You can never be too safe, Ellen. Sign these personality rights waivers for your, image, likeness, and traits. Look. When you come up with a cool and totally original idea.
DR LU
COMPLETELY ORGINAL.
PROF Y
In any media.
DR LU
Living or dead.
PROF Y
Plus t-shirts, posters, cross platform multi-media, possible spin-off’s …
DR LU
Y-Factor, Y-Force, Y-Statix, Y-Vengers, Yustice League –
Y-team congregate! Role call! Pantagruel!
PANTAGRUEL
Haha! Half man, all Sasquatch!
I’m a cutthroat with a fur coat the color of butterscotch!
Born in Iraq to my CIA mom - who
Left me in an orphanage to go fight Saddam!
I’ve got super strength and feelings of neglect.
ELLEN
This guy’s pretty cool.
DR LU
Just wait and see who’s next!
Jean Claude Diskette!
JEAN CLAUDE DISKETTE
Bon jour! Oh no, you see, I am afraid
There’s been un petite, well, um, how do you say… Miss…
Communication? Based on my name-
PROFESSOR Y
JCD your too humble! Ellen, let me explain
She may be modest, but she ain’t no slacker!
With a name like Diskette, she’s a master hacker!
JEAN CLAUDE DISKETTE
No! Ce n’est pas …
PROFESSOR Y
Next!
DR LU
Nerd Flexly!
NERD FLEXLY
Nerd Flexly flex cuz he is mad!
Nerd Flexly like do math and smash!
PROFESSOR Y
If I may step in again:
He was the world’s greatest
Gym rat til one fateful day
He was bit by radioactive
Nerd and gained
The proportional strength
And stamina of a Nerd
Now he crunches numbers
While crushing skulls and protein shakes!
NERD FLEXLY
What she said
DR LU
Ben Simmons!
BEN SIMMONS
That’s right! I know! Here’s my headshot.
ELLEN CANTRELL
Uh…
BEN SIMMONS
You recognized me from my Baretta guest spot.
ELLEN CANTRELL
No…
BEN SIMMONS
My claim to fame is playing Mike Brutality
For seven and a half seasons on NBC!
I played a tough guy who made some arrests…
ELLEN CANTRELL
That’s, cool. I guess.
PROFESSOR Y
Last, not least is my *special guy!*
Who will hold the team together in our most trying times:
He’s Meowmix! Meowmix! Cat with a bow tie!
ALL
Meowmix! Meowmix! Cat with a bow tie!
Meowmix! Meowmix! Cat with a bow tie!
PROFESSOR Y
Y Stands for Yes, so what do you say?
Our team needs a leader who’s clever and brave.
Also we’ve got some stuff planned for later today
So if you could just let us know
ELLEN
You want me to lead this menagerie
Of has-beens and no ones? I’ll have to say “pass,” you see -
I’m no team player. I owe you no favors.
And I’ve always worked alone.
Alone…
PROFESSOR Y
Ellen please! It’s time for you to discover
What it means to be a hero for others.
Alone we fall, but together, with numbers,
We’re a force for good, for hope in this struggle.
I know you feel it,
So come join a team that you can believe in!
ALL
The Y Team! The Y Team! The Y Team! Ooo!
The Y Team!
DR LU
Trademark!
ALL
The Y Team!
DR LU
Copyright!
ALL
The Y Team! Ooo!
DR LU
Legally protected by the Lanham Act!
ALL
The Y Team! The Y Team! Yeah!
We are we are we are we are we are a TEAM!
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4. |
Y Team? Because Team!
01:22
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ELLEN
Can it be? A team for me?
I’ve always been alone…
Never got around to making pals
Inside of the Bone Zone
But now, a team to call my own?
A chance, a hope, a family?
And, maybe, finally, a home!
Why Team?
Because Team!
Because Team! Yeah!
Y Team!
Because Team!
Because Team! Yeah!
Alone no longer, together we’re stronger!
A brand new team that will fight for the honor
Of those ‘neath the yoke of these puppety monsters,
Strike fear when they hear our name…
Better together, I know we’ll achieve our goals!
Supporting each other - we’ll be undefeatable!
Give hope to all, of freedom conceivable!
We’ll beat those puppets and rip ‘em new fuzz holes!
Come fight beside me!
One plus you all equals we!
ALL
Y Team!
Because Team!
Because Team! Ooo!
Y Team!
Because Team!
Because Team! Ooo!
Y Team!
Because Team!
Because we are we are we are we are we are a TEAM!
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5. |
The Great Felt Pyramid
02:57
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FUZZO
When I was of the flesh -
A soft and simple kid -
My father poisoned me said,
‘It’s better to be dead than different.’
So I strangled him.
Now, I’m no different since the bomb.
I brought a soft and fuzzy dawn.
But I forgot that night comes next,
Then dawn and night a million times spin on.
One big disappointing sprawl.
Maybe if I’d died
I’d have been memorialized
No blame, my name forever lives my life…
But now: ever thing that frays -
“It’s your fault!” my people say.
I gave peace and I waged war,
It’s not enough, there’s always something more.
Something ripped or something torn.
And maybe if I’d died
I’d have been immortalized
As martyr of this paradise,
Divine and not despised half of the time.
I thought crushing all my enemies would bring delight… It did.
But now I’m bored,
Cuz there’s no one left to crush anymore!
I see a world, soft as a hug…
My arms can’t reach, they’re not enough…
Maybe the credits should have rolled
Over me a long, long time ago…
Maybe if I’d died,
I’d have been immortalized.
Instead I think they wish me dead.
But maybe they’re all right.
Cuz all my fuzzin’ dreams
Are splitting at the seams.
I think I need to wake up,
Or else I’m gonna break apart, I think.
I’m gonna rip apart, I think…
This pyramid’s so high…
This pyramid’s so high…
Maybe I could wake up if I tried…
I was of the flesh
A soft and simple kid
Now I am my father’s age,
I thought I understand what to do next.
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6. |
We Was Fuzz
02:48
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ADVISO
Before the coming of our heaven on Earth,
I knew a man lacking purpose or worth -
A fleshy sack, maybe he looked a bit like… me?
FELTINA
Wait! Was it you??
ADVISO
Shh.
Whining for meaning like it should be gifted.
Wishing a prize for simply existing.
Moaning when no answer came for me- he! Himmmmm.
For him it seemed there was nothing true,
But the dark that ended day.
So he put the gun in his mouth.
He made the world go away.
THEN THE WORLD CAME AWAKE!
He choked on something in the back of his throat.
He dropped the gun, and hacked it up with a croak.
He stood and stared at that bullet made of yarn.
Outside his windows, a light was shining.
He felt the light, not just outside, but inside him!
He felt the hardness turning soft in his furry heart.
In that moment he was born anew,
When he was shown there was a way.
A power greater than he-
And it was calling his name!
“Adviso! I neeeed you!”
“Elder Fuzz is that you??”
Yes! It was me all along!! Ha!
His love is gentle, and
His promise genuine.
Embrace his tendrils, and feel:
We are the Fuzz of his Fuzz!
He gave his favorite son,
Fuzzo, the chosen one!
To teach and care for us.
We are the Fuzz of his
Fuuuuuuuzz.
Fuuuuuuuzz!
His felt is my felt and if
You felt what I felt you too
Would climb the mountains and sing:
We are the Fuzz of his Fuzz!
Protect his majesty!
Destroy his enemies!
When he splits, our stuffing leaks.
We are the Fuzz of his
Fuuuuuuuzz.
His Fuuuuuuuzz!
We are the Fuzz!
Of his Fu-uh-uh-uzz.
A living god, proof in faith.
This perfect world, his gift, our fate:
A second chance to begin again in Fuzz.
We are the tailors of his promised land,
With his tools we work in praise:
Thread and needle to join,
Scissors to cut those who stray.
Ooooo.
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7. |
Time Travel is Hard
02:01
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PROFESSOR Y
Pardon if you will my total impatience
For quaint, man-splained takes filled with misinformation
In areas covered in my dissertation:
It hits a bit of a nerve.
DOCTOR LU
We do appreciate your observation,
But we’ve put countless hours and unnumbered equations
Into Faraday Cages, Tipler Cylinder rotations,
And to put it in the simplest terms:
PROFESSOR Y
Time travel is hard
DOCTOR LU
Time Travel is Hard!
BOTH
Time travel is haaaaard.
PROFESSOR Y
It’s energy and mass
DOCTOR LU
It’s a whole lotta math!
BOTH
Time travel is haaaaard.
PROFESSOR Y
So if you’re bored with all those laws of physics,
And if you think you got a better suggestion,
Consider:
Maybe you’re not smart?
Time travel is hard.
DOCTOR LU
Time travel is hard.
PROFESSOR Y
Just so you know, it isn’t all Deloreans and TARDIS Boxes all the time!
DOCTOR LU
La La La La La!
La La La La La!
PROFESSOR Y
You could blow up our whole timeline, major paradoxes popping left and right!
DOCTOR LU
La La La La La!
La La La La La!
PROFESSOR Y
You could kill us all!
Or maybe kiss your mom.
So maybe let’s be sensible -
Leave this to the professionals,
Cuz maybe your ideas are pretty dumb?
BOTH
Yeah?
PROFESSOR Y
The 4th Dimension is a new frontier.
Our comprehension of it’s taken years
Of careful study, lots of money…
DOCTOR LU
And YES of course we’ve seen 12 Monkeys -
Thanks for the suggestion buddy!
PROFESSOR Y
So if it seems like we’re just making up stuff,
Covering plot holes with science and numbers,
Maybe instead you could wonder
BOTH
Why the stuff we are saying makes you feel a lil’ bit dumber.
Time Travel is hard!
PROFESSOR Y
Time travel is hard!
Time travel is haaaard!
It’s a whole lotta of math,
Present future and past
Time travel is haaaard!
DOCTOR LU
It’s a massive mass of calculations,
And countless hours of observations,
Dissecting absolutes of time and space and
Avoiding mass temporal devastation.
PROFESSOR Y
So maybe don’t go off and strain your neurons.
Go with the flow and trust that we’ve got this one.
BOTH
We know you think you’re pretty sharp,
But trust us you are in the dark.
Allow us one final remark:
Time travel is hard.
Time travel is hard.
Time travel is hard.
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8. |
Traveling Boob
03:24
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MAMA
As the roof collapsed upon us,
The inferno burning bright,
I felt my stitches bursting
As they danced within the fire.
I said a prayer to Fuzz below,
And he delivered inspiration!
I stuffed my brains into my boob and
Rolled from the conflagration!
I rolled up hills and tumbled down through the dales,
This mama tee-tah rolling ev-er-ee-where.
The world was hard.
FUZZO
It was hard!
MAMA
My faith was growing threadbare.
With nipple as my compass, stars as my guide,
So many times I could have curled up and died, but then I
Oh then I heard it,
FUZZO
Heard what?
MAMA
A great big bang in the sky!
FUZZO
Oh Yeah! That one!
MAMA
The earth went furry!
FUZZO
Furry!
MAMA
Oh yeah my baby did right!
FUZZO
Oh thanks Mama!
Oh Traveling Boob, Traveling Boob!
MAMA
I hadta get home to you!
FUZZO
Oh Traveling Boob, Traveling Boob!
MAMA
Tryin’ ta get home to you!
My faith restored, I rolled in search of the Fuzz.
My hope burned bright deep in my areola.
His world had come!
FUZZO
It had come!
MAMA
And I was finally home!
I sailed the blanket seas, crossed deserts of lint.
I heard the rumors of New Fuzzopolis, and their new king:
Emperor Fuzzo!
FUZZO
Oh-oh!
MAMA
I wondered who that could be?
My darling baby,
FUZZO
That’s me!
MAMA
That they had taken from me!
FUZZO
Oh Traveling Boob, Traveling Boob!
MAMA
I hadta get home to you!
FUZZO
Oh Traveling Boob, Traveling Boob!
MAMA
Tryin’ ta get home to you!
BOTH
Oh Traveling Boob, Traveling Boob!
Gotta get home to you!
Oh Traveling Boob, Traveling Boob!
Tryin’ ta get home to you!
FUZZO
The world I made was soft and new,
But I was scared, what could I do?
How could I ever lead the chosen Furred?
Then deep within my darkest hour,
A voice called out so warm and round.
I turned and saw my mother’s boob.
She spoke and told me what to do
And nuzzled me until my faith returned!
She said:
MAMA
Allow me to advise you from behind the throne,
For no one would believe a single talking boob alone.
You’ll be the face the people cheer for my secret contributions
To our holy ways, laws and amendments to the fuzztitution…
FUZZO
Oh Traveling Boob, Traveling Boob!
You are my Mama Boob
Oh Traveling Boob, Traveling Boob!
I owe my world to you.
FUZZO
Oh Traveling Boob, Traveling Boob!
MAMA
I had to get home to you!
FUZZO
Oh Traveling Boob, Traveling Boob!
MAMA
Just tryin’ ta get home to you!
PROFESSIONAL CHORUS
Oh Traveling Boob, Traveling Boob!
She had to get home to you!
Oh Traveling Boob, Traveling Boob!
Just tryin’ ta get home to you!
Oh Traveling Boob, Traveling Boob!
She had to get home to you!
Oh Traveling Boob, Traveling Boob!
Just tryin’ ta get home to you!
MAMA
I had to get home to you!
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9. |
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BRUSHEE
All I knew was the prophecy that they taught
Whatever that they thought was fine by me.
All I saw was what others saw for me,
Until I couldn’t see who stood there by me
By me ooo
By me by me ooo
By me by me ooo
By me by me ooo-oo-oo-oo-ooo
FUZZO
All I knew was the sick inside of me
Saw what my father sees when he stared thru me
All I had; a brother’d look me in the eye.
It may have saved my life to have him there by me
By me ooo
By me by me ooo
By me by me ooo
By me by me ooo-oo-oo-oo-ooo
All the wasted Fuzz
There never was enough
Time to see just who I was
Was all that was enough.
BRUSHEE
All the wasted words
Not seeing who we were
FUZZO
You loved who I truly am
BOTH
You’re my brother and my friend
BRUSHEE
And all the wasted Teeth
All the things I hoped to find
Took me further from my roots
From the friend I left behind
BOTH
And all the wasted time
When I thought I was alone
Not being who I was
With the one who really knows
The lonely branch that is our home
Well you will never be alone
So long as I am by you ooo, ooo-oo-oo-oo-ooo
By you ooo
So long as I am by you ooo, ooo-oo-oo-oo-ooo
BRUSHEE
Alone, but together, awaiting our fate
FUZZO
Two sides of a coin that’s still spinning away
BRUSHEE
As we hope for Toothier
FUZZO
Fuzzier
BOTH
Brother-er
Days.
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10. |
Someone Special
02:11
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PROFESSOR Y
Look in the mirror, what do you see?
A sloppy middle-aged wannabe, oh-oh-oh
But look again, it’s there, inside
The key to what we need to find
All you need is some simple subtraction
Remove yourself and what remains is the main attraction
Whoa, oh oh, Someone Special.
DR LU
What qualities would best describe you?
What awful adjectives depress, yet define you?
A laundry list of distressing affections
A walking advertisement for contraception
But in those words, greatness is near
Just take their opposites, combine and reveal
Whoa, oh oh, Someone Special.
PROFESSOR Y
Someone great!
Someone good!
Someone fair!
Someone working for a better world for all who live there
Someone giving of themselves so that all others may share
Someone Special!
Someone Special!
Oh-ai!
Now Greatness seems like such a common trait
But rarely is there greatness in those claiming they’re great
Yes, Greatness comes to very few
And they’re not here long before they’re through
Yet greatness isn’t measured in it’s duration
But for the good it creates by inspiration
You’re not great, anyone can see and
Though it’s trickier to tell, there’s little greatness in me
But if we could serve a higher good for all of society
Maybe for a moment we would know what it’s like to be…
Whoa, oh oh…
Whoa, oh oh…
Whoa, oh oh, Someone Special.
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11. |
||||
FELTINA
You, you really got it going on
And I (I, I) want you,
More than I ever wanted anyone
Who needs genitals when I got my girl
Who can nuzzle like no other could aspire?
Your puppet curves, they drive me wild, girl.
Wanna give it to you
Wanna give it to you
Wanna give it to you-oo-oo-oo-ooo!
HUPHELUMPHUGUS
You, you really got it going on
And I (I, I) ‘m gonna set the mood,
How ‘bout some fuzzin’ ambiance?
Felt you up and fuzz you down
Show me where you’re fluffy now
Trust me I know what to do
You’ve been naughty, kept me begging
Maybe your fur needs some heavy petting
Let me get my paws one you
BOTH
That puppet loving - gets me hot up in my pelt
That sort of feeling when you’re feeling up some felt
There ain’t nothing gets me like your love, unparalleled
Two fuzzy bodies get kinetic
Get that friction so electric!
HUPHELUMPHUGUS
Patchwork patches need some rubbing
Shove your muzzle in my cotton
If I had teeth I’d bite my lip, love
Pull my stitches, pop my buttons
Get me static in my stuff in
Give me all you’ve got to give, love!
BOTH
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
HUPHELUMPHUGUS
That puppet loving - gets me hot up in my pelt
That sort of feeling when you’re feeling up some felt
There ain’t nothing gets me like your love, unparalleled
Two fuzzy bodies get kinetic
Get that friction so electric!
Ohhh-oh-oh-oh!
BOTH
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
Wanna nuzzle, wanna nuzzle you bad girl
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12. |
Oskiebilities
01:32
|
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LIL OSKIE
The sun is shining - and the time for me is now!
That silver lining is just waiting to be found!
I’ll be all I can be!
Just my bow tie and me!
Watch me seize my
Oskibilities!
I’ll pull my bootstraps ’til my orphan days are done!
I’ve just my wits and this copy of Atlas Fuzzed
I’ll take what’s mine
No compromise
I’ll put the I in Ayn Rand
Oskibilities!
Oskibilities!
Death to humility!
There’s no stopping this objectivist, no ma’am!
Oskibilities!
Hands off my liberty!
I’ll climb that that ladder, bust that ceiling
Leave all those behind me bleeding
Yeah!
EXUBERANT MALE CHORUS
O S K I E - abilities!
LIL OSKIE
Lil Oskie’s dreaming big!
EXUBERANT MALE CHORUS
O S K I E - abilities!
LIL OSKIE
I’m not selling out - I’m buying in!
God as my witness, Milton Friedman as my guide
There’s just no limit - now that I’ve got my bow tie!
I’ll be all I can be!
Cuz it’s all about me!
Time me seize my
Oskibili-
That’s my ticket - Rags to riches,
With my wits I’ll get there quickest
I’ll cream the crop cuz I exhibit
Oskibitlities!
Heck Yeah!
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Podmusical New York
THE FALL OF THE HOUSE OF SUNSHINE is a serialized comedy musical podcast.
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